Comments on: The Key To Happiness When You’re Single http://www.utahsinglesblog.com/2007/01/the-key-to-happiness-when-youre-single/ Raising the Bar on Dating in these Latter Days Wed, 08 Feb 2012 09:36:05 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.7.1 hourly 1 By: Amy http://www.utahsinglesblog.com/2007/01/the-key-to-happiness-when-youre-single/comment-page-1/#comment-124 Amy Mon, 22 Jan 2007 01:09:56 +0000 http://www.utahsinglesblog.com/the-key-to-happiness-when-youre-single/#comment-124 Melissa has it totally right. Who you date makes a huge difference. I know because (a) I've dated everyone and their dog (or at least some of them were like dogs) and (b) I have seen how who you date can get you in a cycle of dating either consistently good or consistently bad people. The thing that really stopped me from dating guys that were manipulative/abusive/liars/etc. was just sitting down and prayerfully deciding what I really wanted and promising myself and God that I would do my best to be all of those things and date men that were all of those things. My list was long, because it included specific spirituality items, habits both temporal and spiritual, hobbies that I wanted to share, attitudes about me and women in general, what his parents were like, what he would refuse to do, etc. This definitely didn't end my days of "it not working out" but it definitely ended my scum-dating era. I dated different guys, then lost them when they didn't fit what I wanted, period. Honestly, it was a matter of months before THE LIST in human male form walked up to me and asked me out, but he did. Dating the right guy means more than just generic stuff: being nice, smart, spiritual, and good-looking. Everyone has things that they need in a companion, like that he needs to love math, or he needs to enjoy hiking. Those things are worth looking for! Trust me, if you find the right guy, marriage will exceed all of your expectations. It won't be just a different set of problems. There will be problems, but there will be two of you to solve them. Find the right guy and you'll probably decide that being single, in retrospect, sucks. No offense, but compared to a good marriage, it does. That Mr. List is worth finding, so be willing to be picky about who is "the right person to date" for you. Melissa has it totally right. Who you date makes a huge difference. I know because (a) I’ve dated everyone and their dog (or at least some of them were like dogs) and (b) I have seen how who you date can get you in a cycle of dating either consistently good or consistently bad people. The thing that really stopped me from dating guys that were manipulative/abusive/liars/etc. was just sitting down and prayerfully deciding what I really wanted and promising myself and God that I would do my best to be all of those things and date men that were all of those things. My list was long, because it included specific spirituality items, habits both temporal and spiritual, hobbies that I wanted to share, attitudes about me and women in general, what his parents were like, what he would refuse to do, etc. This definitely didn’t end my days of “it not working out” but it definitely ended my scum-dating era. I dated different guys, then lost them when they didn’t fit what I wanted, period. Honestly, it was a matter of months before THE LIST in human male form walked up to me and asked me out, but he did.

Dating the right guy means more than just generic stuff: being nice, smart, spiritual, and good-looking. Everyone has things that they need in a companion, like that he needs to love math, or he needs to enjoy hiking. Those things are worth looking for! Trust me, if you find the right guy, marriage will exceed all of your expectations. It won’t be just a different set of problems. There will be problems, but there will be two of you to solve them. Find the right guy and you’ll probably decide that being single, in retrospect, sucks. No offense, but compared to a good marriage, it does. That Mr. List is worth finding, so be willing to be picky about who is “the right person to date” for you.

]]>